


New Changes

by terror1978



Category: Eddsworld - All Media Types
Genre: Abuse Mentions, Violence, Weapons, i will mark more as it comes, there will be some heavy content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2019-06-13 10:05:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15362130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terror1978/pseuds/terror1978
Summary: Tord starts high school, meeting new friends who are unaware of his background and the fact that he's the one taking care of his guardians at home.





	1. Chapter 1

Tord woke up to the sounds of quiet talking and of someone stumbling around in the kitchen trying to accomplish something. Bright sunlight streamed through his window and landed on a patch on the wood flooring of his bedroom. The room was quite bare and the few items in it strange for a teenager Tord’s age, with a red and blue uniform in one corner, a backpack in the other, and a small handgun on a dresser. The room besides the items was decorated sparsely and it gave an appearance of someone who had just moved in, and the truth was, he had.   
He and two other soldiers by the names of Paul and Patryk had made a close escape from an underground military base called the Red Army by faking their deaths. In the Red Army, children and babies were kidnapped, highly trained in combat, first aid, and emergency surgery, and raised to be either Leaders- assertive, aggressive and controlling- or Workers, submissive, and completely at the command of their Leaders. Workers were also age regressed to the mindsets of young children with the amount of trauma needed to keep them so compliant. They were assigned with or without a partner to a Leader much like bodyguards- their sole duty was to keep. Keep their Leader’s commands, and keep their Leader alive, no matter what.  
Whether you liked your fellow workers or your leader wasn’t a concern to the Red Leader or the commanders. In fact, friendships, love, and relationships of all kinds were prohibited, and punished severely. If you let it be known that you loved someone, you may as well be holding a gun to their head, as a common punishment for such acts was to kill your betrothed, endure sessions of torture, and often be executed yourself. Food and sleep were privileges granted to soldiers at the mercy of those higher in command- Working sleep deprived, late into the night or waking early in the morning was the norm, and anyone can work on an empty stomach if pushed (or threatened) hard enough. Punishments such as losing food or sleep were commonplace and torture was administered to deter virtually anything that went against strict commands and duties, to keep their Workers submissive, or for some Leaders, just for sport.   
The Red Army practiced human experimentation and organized crime, the details of which you only knew if you were unfortunate enough to be assigned to a mission in these areas, or sent to the lab as a guinea pig for a punishment. However, the Red Army’s ultimate goal was to seep into every corner of the world, take it over, and create their own sort of sick utopia.   
In short, it was utterly corrupt, utterly impossible to get out of without dying, and it was by the skin on God’s heel and after a full year of planning that Tord had managed to pull off the scam that allowed him and his two Workers to now live in hiding. Safely, free to their own devices… And Tord would be going to school.   
Tord realized with a start that he was starting his first day of eleventh grade today, and his faithful Workers had failed to wake him up on time. As sweet as they were, they were in no way fit to be his caretakers, and Tord was usually the one fulfilling that role for them these days, a heavy role for a sixteen year old. He scrambled out of bed and shoved himself into his clothing- a grey shirt, jeans, and a black coat on top. He rushed into the kitchen, and his accented voice interrupted the soft morning noise that he walked in on.  
“Paul! Patryk! You were meant to wake me up!” He said, raising his voice.   
“Oh-!! I am so sorry, boss!! We didn't forget!! But you looked so very sleepy, sir, so we let you sleep more!! We were not trying to be bad!!” Patryk squeaked out this guilty reply. He was tall, thin, with shoulder length, dark brown hair and tan skin.   
“Yes, it was my idea sir!” Paul affirmed quickly. He was fair skinned, built wider and more muscular than Patryk, with thick eyebrows that were darker than his messy, light brown hair. He had a cigarette in his mouth. He had picked up smoking in the Red Army and did so compulsively.   
Both wore the red turtlenecks of their uniform. They were built like soldiers and had the bodies of men who had been through constant labor and abuse and each were covered with their own array of scars. Mentally, though, they were children, with Patryk’s age being somewhere around six and Paul’s about eight.   
“Faen…” Tord cursed. He was stressed and in a hurry, but he didn't want to spook his Workers. They were used to severe punishment, and he wanted that as far behind him as possible.   
He gave an exasperated sigh and shook his head. “No.. I'll take a later bus. It's fine.. It's okay. Just be good today and stay in the house, okay? Just.. Mm, make up a game or something. You'll be fine. We’ll figure it out.” Tord rambled, half of it for himself. This would be new to all three. Tord had never been out of sight from his workers for such an extended period of time before and he didn't know how they would handle. He was worried.   
“Um.. O-Okay boss…!” Patryk said quietly, just as worried.   
“Okay, boss…” Paul echoed. He turned and presented a plate to his Leader. “Boss, I.. Made you food! Will they give you food there?”   
“Oh, thank you, Paul..” Tord took the plate of, uh, eggs from him, and nodded. “Yes, they have food! It's safe there, and I'll be home later this afternoon.” He sat down and ate a few bites. Paul was one hell of a soldier, but he wasn't a cook.   
As polite as he could manage, Tord stood up again and washed the plate. “I have to be fast.. I'll see you soon, okay kiddos?” He said, and once he got goodbyes from them he ran back to his room.   
He made sure everything he needed was in his backpack. He eyed the handgun on his dresser, and crossed over to it, clicking the safety on and hiding it deep in his bag. He felt his anxiety subside a little knowing the weapon was in there. He slung it over his shoulder, and ran to catch the bus before he was even later.


	2. Chapter 2

Edd shaded in the hair of the drawing he was doing in the margins of his notebook, doodling and waiting for class to start. He focused on it for a little while, but then his eyes began to wander around the room as new faces began to fill the desks around him. Edd usually wasn't the most punctual student, but wanted to be early today so he didn't get stuck at a desk he didn't want. He was a bit nearsighted as well, and should probably wear his reading glasses more, but he had made it a habit to sit closer to the front instead.   
One kid in particular caught his eye, because he had a careful, hypervigilant way of moving like he expected someone to sneak up behind him. He sat stiffly in the desk opposite Edd, and Edd studied him.  
The kid looked disheveled, the fashion of most people who came in late on their first day. His hair was a dark shade of strawberry blonde and stuck up in awkward tufts like the prongs of a fork. His eyes were so hazel they almost looked orange. He had a world-weary, agitated look, and had thin, wiry limbs. He looked strong in his own way, and Edd took a liking to him immediately.   
“Hey!” Edd turned around in his chair and got the boy’s attention. He seemed startled. “Hey! Sorry for scaring you. My name’s Edd! Are you new here?” He asked.   
“I'm Tord,” Tord replied, squinting at him distrustfully. “I am new here, but it shouldn't matter too much to you.”   
“I was just wondering, since I haven't seen you around before!” Edd shrugged, seemingly immune to Tord’s attempts to ward him off. “I can show you around if you'd like.” Tord seemed to be too busy staring him down with suspicion to say much, which was disappointing, because he wanted to hear more of his voice and the accent that Edd inwardly thought was adorable.   
He held up his notebook after a pause.  
“I like drawing, writing comics and stuff..” He explained. He changed topics to something that he figured would be less invasive. “Do you like to draw or anything?”   
“Mm, no.. I don't draw. I don't do a lot. I don't have much time on my own.” Tord answered.   
“Oh.. Well, why don't you eat lunch with my friends and I? I'm sure they'd love to meet you!” Edd offered.  
“Eh..” Tord looked down, took a deep breath, and looked up, shrugging. “I.. Okay. I will, then.” 

\-----

The day crawled by, and the last thing that Tord wanted to do was spend half an hour with a group of kids he didn't know.   
He didn't trust Edd. Edd had no reason to be nice to him, let alone invite him to eat with him and introduce him to his friends. The scenarios of what Edd could possibly want from him spun through his mind until he was sick and by lunchtime, he was a nervous wreck.   
He scanned the crowded pandemonium of the cafeteria for a slightly heavyset kid with a green shirt and chocolate bangs falling over his eyes. When he found him, he crossed over. He kind of hovered a little ways away, taking in the other people Edd was sitting with.   
Edd was to one side with a can of soda and a tray of spaghetti served by the school. Beside him was a tall boy with fantastically fluffy ginger hair, fantastic wide green eyes, a fantastic amount of freckles covering his pale skin, and a green overcoat all buttoned up even though it was indoors. He had a baggie of goldfish crackers and was taking bites of a sandwich and smiling at everyone. At the other end was a short kid who looked even shorter next to the redhead. His skin was a shade darker, and his unwashed dark hair stuck straight up, making his completely black eyes visible. He wore a black shirt with long sleeves and a white skull on the front, and he seemed either uninterested or distracted. He tapped his finger on the table and wasn't eating anything at all.   
Edd saw Tord and waved, ending Tord’s careful scrutiny of his friends.   
“Tord! You came!!” Edd called, and Tord sheepishly joined them, sitting across Edd when he invited him with a bit of hesitation.   
“Hi, Tord! Tord, this is Matt and Tom.” He pointed to the ginger and the one with black eyes, respectively. “Guys, I met Tord in homeroom.” Edd introduced him.  
“Eh.. Hello…” Tord gave a nervous smile and a tiny wave.   
“Hi Tord!” Matt waved back, grinning. “..Hey,” Tom said, looking him up and down. Tom made Tord nervous, so he tried to avoid his eyes as he set his food down.   
“See, Matt, I can make new friends, too!” Edd grinned at the redhead.   
“Friend is a strong word,” Tom muttered to that comment. That made Tord snort, but Tom just looked at him in annoyance.   
“Well, sit down, Tord!” Matt chirped, ignoring Tom, seeming to share a similar positivity as Edd, just bubblier and louder. “Are you new here? How are you liking it here so far?”   
“Ehm-” Tord didn’t expect the question. “It- It is okay. It’s not hard to get used to.” He mumbled, turning beet red. He took a forkful of the school lunch, and gingerly took a bite, because everyone was looking at him and he felt somewhat uncomfortable, especially because in the Red Army food wasn’t just something you ate every day with friends. He felt like they were going to take it or that someone was going to force him to do something else.   
“Haha! Yeah, it’s not that bad.” Edd agreed. He seemed oblivious to how wracked with anxiety Tord looked, but then Tord caught him looking him up and down. “Hey… You okay?” He asked.   
Tord squeaked and quickly took another bite. “Fine! Yes!” He now felt everyone’s eyes on him more than ever, and he felt like his skin was burning. “S-.. Stop looking at me!” He snapped a little, before he really thought about it.   
“Oh- Sorry..” Edd apologized. He frowned a little, not sure why Tord had been so uncomfortable. He chalked it up to nervousness, seeing as he had just met them all, and he was new, but he couldn’t shake the small feeling that the teenager he’d met had more going on than he realized.


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tord goes home after his first day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kind comments. I will be uploading regularly from now on. :-)

The world seemed to fly past, trees and pedestrians blurring as buildings assertively stood their ground before becoming obscured as the bus turned a corner. Tord’s eyes glazed over as he looked out of the window and thought about his day.   
He always felt so much older than he was, especially when surrounded by other soldiers. Today had thrown him for a loop, when he suddenly wasn't the authority and his peers were all kids with innocence and naieveté in their angst and their communication. He felt the dissonance strongly, until he was almost watching himself interact and complete tasks.   
His classes were surprisingly hard, since the only schooling he had was more fit for battles than exams. English was the worst- Tord was much more fluent in Norwegian, or even Polish or Dutch, than English. He felt ostracized for his accent, or maybe he was just overthinking it. It had been a field day for anxiety.   
He remembered Edd and chewed on the thought for a while. He still didn't trust him, but he seemed nice enough. He almost felt like finding him again tomorrow and just.. Talking. He wanted to tell him everything.   
Immediately he pushed that thought away. It could never happen. He'd always be an outsider, and you could almost smell it.   
He pushed away the thought of Tom and Matt even before it formed. They intimidated him even more. Matt seemed nice enough, too, but his exuberance scared him. Tom on the other hand didn't even seem nice. He related somewhat to him, but was mostly uncomfortable around the way he disregarded the world and didn't seem to care how rude he came off.  
The bus screeched to a halt, and Tord stepped down from his seat and exited with a nervous “Thank you, sir,” to the driver, feeling a little sick.   
He entered his house and immediately Paul and Patryk were there to greet him, bombarding him with anxious chatter.   
“H-How did it go, boss??” Patryk chirped.   
“Are you okay, boss? Did anything happen?” Paul added with wide eyes, looking him down.   
“What did you do??”   
“We were so worried, sir!!”   
“Are you okay?”   
“Ach, jeg har det bra!” Tord cut in. “I'm fine! Stand down, you two!” He said, waving his arms at them harshly and going straight to his room.   
He dumped his bag down, unzipping it and digging out the handgun once more, putting it in his pocket. He took a deep breath, covering his face and feeling the suppressed waves of anxiety gather in his face, tears pricking at his eyes. He was more exhausted than he thought, but he needed to tend to his Workers. He took another deep, shaky breath, rubbing his eyes until he saw stars, and swallowed the anxiety to go back downstairs. 

Patryk was crying, and Paul clung to him, sweetly and worriedly wiping his tears away.   
“S-Sorry!!” Patryk whimpered, sounding scared. “I’m s-sorry, sir! I-I.. W-We were just s-so worried!!”  
“Oh.. kjære, I'm not mad at you.. I'm sorry.. I was just really tired when I got home. Don't cry, okay..?” Tord whispered, feeling guilty and pushing his feelings away again so he wouldn't make Patryk more scared. He knew he was sensitive. He went and brought the taller Worker into a hug, to which he bent down slightly so Tord could brush his hair back.   
Paul stood stoically, hands clasped in front of his face as he watched Patryk calm down. He pulled out another cigarette and lit it, the smoke turning Tord’s already upset stomach.   
Everyone calmed down after another minute, and Tord let go of Patryk, going into the kitchen. He pulled out bread and started to spread it with butter.   
“Were you two okay?” He asked, tone slightly worn.   
“Oh, yes! We just made a game where we have to stand up and sit down really fast!” Patryk recalled, already starting to cheer up.   
“You always can win. Except if you don't, you have to do it next time,” Paul added with the authoritative air of the rules.   
“Oh.. That's fun.” Tord still didn't understand what they were talking about. He produced a block of cheese and sliced it carefully to arrange on each piece of bread.   
“Yes! And then we got very so worried about you, sir,” Patryk chimed cheerily. “So we were a little scared until you got home!”   
“I said you were okay, boss! But we are supposed to be with you!” Paul added sternly.   
“Um-..” The bread and cheese was assembled. Tord put it onto plates, not knowing what else to serve. “I'm okay on my own, kiddo. I'll be safe. I promise,” He said, putting on a reassuring smile as he crossed to the table and set Paul and Patryk’s dinner on the table. “Come eat, okay? Chodź jeść.” He gestured to it.   
Patryk smiled at the Polish command, obeying and going to sit down. He immediately wolfed down his food. He pushed it into his mouth faster than he could chew and swallow, putting him in danger of choking, but he was just scared it would be taken from him.   
Tord nodded to Paul, too, who was standing obediently and waiting for his permission. “You can eat, too, Paul. You don't need to ask,” He said.   
Paul nodded a little back, carefully taking a seat next to Patryk and instinctively checking his surroundings before peeling the cheese off of his bread. He folded the bread over once and put it into his coat pocket. He always saved and hid his food, in case he wasn't allowed it later. He turned to eat the cheese.   
“Put your cigarette out before you eat, hun,” Tord said, lifting his bread and taking a small bite.   
“Oh-!! Sorry, boss!” Paul squeaked, pulling the cigarette out of his mouth and putting it out. He put the half-smoked thing behind his ear and ate his cheese by itself, still scanning the room. 

Tord didn't like watching the two Workers look around the room in fear of their food being taken away. He was hungry, but the anxiety from his first day and from being home closed up his stomach. He was out of the Red Army, but it was everywhere he looked. He just wanted a break and wanted to cry. He took one more careful bite and stood up, putting his uneaten dinner into the fridge. He wasn't going to waste his food either. He'd have it for breakfast.   
“I'm going to sleep.. Wake me up if you need anything and I'll help you get to bed, alright?” He looked at the two wearily.   
“Y-Yes, sir!” Patryk responded after coughing a little on his food.   
“Yes, boss..” Paul immediately added, his own food already put away.   
“Okay.. Good..” Tord said. He crossed over and awkwardly ruffled each of their heads, before going to his room once more.   
He set the alarm for that evening, so he could make sure Paul and Patryk slept. He barely took his shoes off before he pulled the covers over his head, pressing the blanket to his face and taking suffocating breaths until tears spilled down his face. He really wished he had someone to hold onto that would take care of him and sing him to sleep.   
He pressed the blanket harder into his face and eyes, until his mind slowed down and he finally fell into a fitful nap.


	4. Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (CW for homophobia.)

“Edward! Come eat breakfast! You're going to be late!”   
Edd groaned, shoving his pillow into his face. He hadn't slept very well, and the last thing he wanted to do was be talked to by his parents. He kept groaning as he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He glanced at the reading glasses on his bedside table, leaving them as he got out of bed and plodding downstairs. 

Edd’s mother pointed at a bowl of oatmeal on the table, washing dishes with rubber gloves on. She had permed brown hair, which annoyed Edd. Was this the 70’s?   
He sat down in front of his oatmeal, frowning at the bowl of food. He stirred milk into it and got up to put sugar on top.   
“Edward, you don't need sugar. Put some fruit in that.”   
“I have to leave, okay? I don't have time to cut up fruit.” Edd grumbled tiredly, defiantly putting sugar in his oatmeal and going to sit back down.   
“And wear your glasses. We paid for those.” His mother added.   
“Mum!” He protested. “I don't need to wear them all the time. Just to read.” He put a spoonful of squishy oatmeal in his mouth and swallowed almost without chewing.   
“I don't see you wearing them to read, either.” A washed plate clattered onto a rack.   
“He just doesn't want to wear them because he picked out the girl frames by accident.” Edd’s dad walked into the kitchen, pouring himself coffee and glancing at Edd with a side smirk. “He doesn't want to look gay.”   
“I'm not gay, dad.” Edd muttered, taking another bite and looking down into his food.   
“Brent, he just doesn't care about his vision.”   
“Right. Is that why he's growing his hair out, too?”   
“Dad, I'm not fucking gay!”   
“Language, Edward.” His mom shot him a look.   
“Oh, calm down. I'm just teasing you.” His dad replied defensively, going to clap Edd on the shoulder. “Handsome man like you will be a heartbreaker.”   
Edd had had enough, and stood up to put his bowl in the sink.   
“Rinse!” His mom demanded, pointing to the bowl.   
“Ugh.. Sorry, mum..” Edd sighed, washing the bowl before dropping it into the sink again.   
“You'll break it that way! Do you not care about the work I do in this house, Edward?”   
“Mum, I have to go!” Edd snapped, leaving hastily to finish getting ready for school.

Edd got out of his dad's car and walked to homeroom. He had a headache and did not feel like being here, but he was glad to not be home. His parents were infuriating to be around.   
When he sat down he was a little surprised to see Tord already there. His spirits lifted a little, and he tapped Tord on the shoulder.   
Tord flinched, and Edd felt a little guilty.   
“Sorry-! Hey.. How are you?” Edd asked, studying him. Tord looked exhausted, like he had been crying instead of sleeping.   
“Eh.. Uh, fine.. How are you?”   
“I'm okay.. Um, have you eaten today?” He didn't know what prompted him to ask that, but when Tord hesitantly shook his head, he was glad he did. He picked up his backpack and dug through until he pulled out a granola bar and an apple his mother gave him for lunch, and he handed them over to Tord.   
Tord looked a little surprised, holding a food item gingerly in each hand.   
“Ehm..” He stuttered, looking a little confused.   
“You can have those! I already ate. I don't need them. I usually eat the school’s lunch.”   
“..Okay. Thank you, Edd!” Tord said with a little smile. He shyly unwrapped the granola bar and took a small bite, expression softening a little. “I didn't know you had glasses…?”   
“Oh! Um! Uh..” Edd took his glasses off and put them in a case. “They're just reading glasses, haha.”   
“Okay.. Well you look nice.” Tord said.  
“Haha.. Thanks,” Edd replied, smiling.   
“Yes! You are welcome..” Tord smiled back and held his gaze for a second before he looked down to finish his granola bar.   
Edd felt warm inside when Tord smiled at him like that. He already felt better than the morning, and it was really nice to see Tord smile. He'd only known him for a few days, but he already liked him. He felt like he’d be a really good friend. He felt like he wanted to hug him, which was weird. He guessed Matt gave hugs all the time, even to people he had barely met, but it was different. Matt could get away with it. Edd didn't want to give off the wrong impression..   
“Uh, did you say yesterday that you draw?” Tord asked him, interrupting the silence and Edd’s thoughts.  
“Yeah, how come?” Edd asked.  
“Mm.. I was telling my-..” Tord hesitated. “My dads about you and they wanted to see your art.”   
Edd blinked. A little surprised. Tord was talking to his parents about him? His dads?   
“Uh-! Wow! Really?”   
“Yes..! I hope that was okay?”   
“Y-Yes, of course it is!” Edd said quickly. A grin spread across his face, and he felt somewhat flattered. “They wanted to see it, but I told them I just met you,” Tord giggled. “I haven't even seen it, I just remember you told me..”   
“Well, you can have some, if you want!”   
“Huh? You don't have to-”   
“Oh, of course! Don't worry about it!” Edd was immediately pulling out his sketchbook and flipping through the pages. He suddenly felt conscious of his art. His parents didn't like it very much, and neither of them thought it was a good use of time. His dad told him it would never get him anywhere. He gave a little frown up at Tord, who was watching him with a little smile that fell slightly when he saw him frown.   
“Are you okay, Edd?”   
“Yeah! I'm fine, sorry. I'm just trying to find something that's not dumb..” He came to a comic and carefully tore the page out, handing it to Tord.   
Tord smiled again and read through it slowly, then giggled a little in surprise. “..Oh!! Haha! That's really funny!” He said.   
“You think so?” Edd replied.   
“Yes I do! Hahaha!” Tord laughed once more. “Can I really have this?” He asked, looking over at Edd with an open smile that warmed his heart.   
“Yeah!! Definitely!! Uh- Thank you!”   
“Thank you, Edd!” Tord responded.   
“No, thank you!”   
“Thank you!!”   
“Thank you!!! I am keeping this forever!”   
Both boys broke into giggles, and Tord carefully put the page into his backpack. They looked at each other and started laughing again, cheeks pinking as they both covered their mouths to keep from getting louder, which only exacerbated their laughter.   
At that the late bell rang, and their homeroom teacher rapped her desk with a pencil to get everyone's attention, making a point to look at Tord and Edd.   
The two boys immediately hushed, but couldn't help giggling quietly each time they met each other’s glances.   
As class progressed, Edd drew in his sketchbook. He began an outline of a comic and sketched Tord in the first panel, smiling.


	5. Dumb Stupid Idiot High School Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I didn't mean to abandon this work, but I've got a lot going on in my life and Eddsworld is really low on my interests right now. I'm still interested in this story, but I'll probably upload sporadically, sorry!

Tom was the first person to lunch this time. He hardly ever ate during school, but he didn’t want to be sitting there awkwardly waiting for Matt, or his friend Edd, or his weirder new friend Tord.   
He had met Matt last year. He wasn’t planning on ever talking to him, but the ginger boy had taken such an interest in him, that it was nearly impossible to avoid him any longer than he already had. Not only that, but, he was starting to enjoy his company a little. Even Edd was alright, and Tom liked his drawings. He did some art himself, once in a while, and he had picked it up for the first time in a while after meeting the two boys.   
A few months ago, during the summer, Edd had invited Tom and Matt to his house, and they spent the day playing video games, watching TV, and looking up weird things on the internet. As much as Tom hated to admit it, he had enjoyed the day. Him and Edd had even made a comic together, and Matt laughed so hard at it, that he spit apple juice out of his nose and it went everywhere, including the comic. He got to keep it after that.   
He found a very hint of a smile creeping onto his face, and he shook his head. Dumb stupid idiot high school boys. They were really idiots. He was a little jealous of how carefree and happy both of them seemed to be, and even though he was warming up to them more and more, he still felt reserved and on edge around him. Tom was usually a lone wolf, and had spent most of his high school career keeping to himself and trying to figure out how to keep everyone else as far away from him as possible. It wasn’t that he hated everyone, he just… Yeah, he pretty much hated everyone. It was hard for him to get to know people, because they were all loud, fast, exuberant.. The opposite of how he felt. He was always saying the wrong thing and he was never in the mood.   
He was waiting in the lunch line now. He slowly went through it, and didn’t really care about what he was getting, he just bought the first thing offered to him. He ended up with a toasted cheese sandwich in a plastic bag and cup of grapes. Okay. He got to the other end and saw Matt’s hair right away, making a beeline to it. As he got closer he saw him chatting with Edd, a big smile on his face and Edd’s notebook on the table. Oh… And Tord was there too. He felt the germ of annoyance inside, and he scowled, going to sit next to Matt. He dropped his lunch down, and Tord’s smile seemed to waver a little when he sat. So the feeling was mutual. He figured.  
“Oh! Hey, Tom!” Edd said happily, glancing at his sandwich before looking at him.   
“It’s just a fuckin’ sandwich.” He said with a roll of his eyes, though that was hard to tell with the color of them.   
“Alright, Tom,” Edd said, looking back at Matt.  
“Tom! Tommy! Did you see this??” Matt grabbed Edd’s notebook and turned it so Tom could see.   
“Don’t call me that,” He grumbled, but took the notebook. He wanted to see.  
It was a comic with Tord and Edd in it, and there was some juvenile joke at the end. For some reason, this one wasn’t as funny as Edd’s comics usually were.   
“Oh.. Is that Tord in it?”   
“Yeah it is! I think I got him good for the first time ever drawing him!”  
“Uh-huh! It looks just like him!” Matt added, giggling.  
“Yeah, it does.” Tom handed the notebook back without looking at Tord. He turned and ate one of the grapes he had, in three small bites.  
“You okay?” Edd asked.  
“Fine.” He swallowed the last of it, and began to eat another in the same fashion.   
“You seem a little angry,” He probed.  
“I’m fine, okay? Maybe that just didn’t tickle my funny bone, or whatever.” Tom could feel Edd frown as he looked at him, but he didn’t really care. He didn’t think it was that fair that Tord had already made it into one of Edd’s comics. They only met him a few days ago, and it wasn’t like he was that interesting, or even that nice. He hardly even spoke English, and Tom didn’t have the patience for that.   
“...Okay, Tom.”   
“Hey! Can I have a grape, please?” Matt asked him, softening the tension. Tom shrugged, so Matt reached in and took one, popping it in his mouth.   
Tom looked over at Matt and studied his face. He suddenly felt the need to shower. He hadn’t today, and seeing how fresh faced and rosy cheeked Matt was made him a little more self-conscious. He wondered about the boy, who didn’t seem to have a single care in the world. He heard him talk to his mom on the phone sometimes, and he always seemed happy. He didn’t think he’d ever once seen him upset. When he thought about it, he realized that he was very emotional in his own way, but he mostly went from one dramatic display to another, tearing up at small things but being able to be cheered up just as quickly. In fact, he was a little distracted most of the time. But he’d never seen him stuck in a mood, or like the weight of the world ever got to him.   
Tom, however, felt like that most of the time. He couldn’t catch up. He could hardly even get out of bed most days. He felt like he was dragging himself through each day, and cut corners in self care because of the sheer effort it took. When he got to the group home where he lived, he usually just slept off the day, waking up periodically to go out of his room, or whenever his roommate was up to something. If he was feeling particularly bad, he’d draw out a hoarded flask of alcohol he kept hidden under his bed. It was against the rules, and not very good for him, but he didn’t care anymore, and he had his contacts around school who kept him with a supply. There were many ways around the rules, and when you lived there permanently, you could often get away with things that would usually get someone kicked out. They didn’t pay as much attention to you.  
Tom was shocked out of his thoughts when he felt Matt’s arms around him, squeezing him from the side. “Hey! Grumpy! Wanna come outside with us?”   
“Uh…” He looked up, and he saw Tord standing and Edd packing up his stuff to come with him. “Yeah, sure…” There wasn’t much choice, was there?   
“Okay!!” Matt grinned and let go of the shorter boy.  
Tom sighed and decided to take his food with him. He was feeling hungry for once.   
The four boys trekked out of the large room and out of a side door, walking into a courtyard where more students milled around and lounged in their usual places. Edd pushed Tom’s shoulder a little, and grinned at him before speeding off to the nearest tree.   
“Uh- Hey!!” Matt squeaked indignantly, sprinting after him.   
Tord looked uncertain, but smiled a little to himself, running after the two and catching up with surprising ease. Where did he get so fast?   
“Hey, Tom…!! C’mon, come over here!” Edd called out happily to the boy, who was still standing there on the pavement.  
Tom blinked over at them, and then sighed, picking up his pace and trotting after the three other boys as the chatter of other kids sounded around him. They all cheered him on exaggeratedly, Matt clapping his hands, and even Tord joining in slowly.  
“God, you guys are stupid!” Tom called out.   
Stupid friends.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone, this is my first published fanfiction. Feedback is welcome, and I hope you all enjoy it. <3


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